Posts by Minimummy

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UKHippy is a long running online community and of likeminded people exploring all interpretations on what it means to be living an alternative lifestyle -- we welcome discussions on everything related to sustainability, the environment, alternative spirituality, music, festivals, politics and more -- membership of this website is free but supported by the community.


    You win, can't be arsed.

    You are however, usually expected to pay if you are sitting exams as an external candidate. As far as I know, it's usually about £50 per exam, but I could be mistaken on this.


    It varies centre to centre, I think.

    Hey all has any one done the home schooling for older kids ready for high school and during the teens? How did they do when reached 16 or 18 with regards to employment or uni? Has any one taken older children out of school and how long did it take to establish thorough learning? Did any one have regrets?


    They can still do GCSEs as a private candidate, so their chances of employment/further education are the same as those who follow a more formal school setting :)

    I've never met you, fool. Don't start rumours :pp


    :p


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    Point there being that you did walk away from it.



    Yeah, but that's cos I'm mega 'ard. Hardly representative now, is it? ;)


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    Also, if people are gonna bully people because of their breasts, if you change your breasts and not the social circle, they'll just find something else to bully you for. That's how bullies work. :shrug:


    Perhaps, but at that point you'd be better able to recognise that this is the pattern bullies adopt. It isn't always easy to see that at first glance. Also, I think that's more of a child's reaction to the change in situation. I can hardly see work colleagues switching from "Small tits" to "Big nose" because they can no longer use the former. But then I've never experienced that, so can't comment.


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    Yes. I think if a woman's so dissatisfied with her breasts that she's considering surgery to change them (extreme examples aside), then the issue isn't her breasts - it's her self-esteem.


    The point I'm trying to make here is that even if it is her self-esteem that is the problem, that has been caused by her breasts and for some people, no amount of counselling can erase that.

    Not really, know. I think you're using an extreme and unrepresentative minority to validate your argument. Pretty much a straw man, really :p I have never met a single woman who's been consistently (or indeed ever!) bullied as an adult because of her breasts.


    *Coughs* You have ;) Albeit from the other end of the spectrum, but had I not walked away from it I might have considered surgery myself. As far as using a very small minority to validate my argument, I figure the only people that would require the surgery for these reasons would be in the minority. I'm not suggesting everyone who walks through the doors of their surgery claiming they need new boobs should get them ;)


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    Self-esteem issues are not caused by body parts. Plenty of people survive quite happily with a variety of different breast sizes. Patently, the underlying issues are not being addressed by surgery.


    So is it your opinion that a woman cannot be completely and utterly satisfied with everything in her life except her breasts? I don't think that's an accurate assessment ;) It's perfectly understandable for one thing to be the cause of much misery, doesn't matter what that one thing is. It therefore stands to reason if that her only issue in life is her breasts then surgery could allow her to have a life that she may not enjoy without it.

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    And the argument still holds - if you can superficially solve one problem with money, why not another one?


    That argument does stand. Just not the particular instance you suggested ;) There are many things that can be solved with money. Some should, other shouldn't. As I said, there's no one right answer to solve all of the problems in the world. We must be empathetic to the many and varied situations that can and do arise. Beyond that, there's no real other response :shrug:


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    Agreed. But we can certainly state that it is only the extremes where surgical intervention should be considered.


    Absolutely.


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    Was that an intentional pun? :S


    No, but it was convenient ;)

    I'm sure it does. But it's hardly representative, is it?


    Well, that depends on the frequency, doesn't it? I don't have facts and figures on this one, but if it happens, then it must be a consideration, representative or not.


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    Now that's not what I said, is it? What I said was that if someone was severely depressed, and giving them a big chunk of dosh would make them a lot happier, then why not? That's entirely in keeping with your argument - that if the state can resolve a problem by throwing cash at it, they should. Granted, it wouldn't be addressing the root issue, but then nor would breast enlargement be addressing the root issue if someone had self-esteem issues.


    That depends. If the reason the person is depressed about lack of money is because they have poor budgeting abilities, then handing them a pile of cash is unlikely to fix that issue. However, there is no reason to suggest that a woman's depression is not solely caused by her breasts. If that's the case, then fixing them fixes the problem.


    See, this isn't a straight-cut argument. In order to judge whether or not intervention is a viable course of action, we must first consider every eventuality which is, in essence, practically impossible.


    In conclusion: there is no one size fits all solution.

    But there's a difference between adults and children. And grown woman don't generally suffer severe bullying because of their breast size.


    It must be nice where you like ;)
    Joking aside, it does happen. Be it weight, boobs or otherwise, some people are cruel all of their lives.


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    That's nice, but incredibly flawed. If I was depressed, and a million quid would make my life bearable, should I expect it on the NHS?


    Having no dosh just isn't comparable to not being able to look at yourself in the mirror without vomiting because you feel so disgusted with the way you look. The two states of mind are completely different.


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    I'd suggest that it's even more counter-productive to address what are essentially issues of self-esteem and self-worth through surgery.


    Not if it fixes the problem without causing drawn-out agony unnecessarily ;)


    We'll be at this all day :whistle:

    I simply don't buy this. It's impossible to be mentally and emotionally happy without having your breasts stuffed with silicone? I don't think so.


    And as someone mentioned earlier, where do we draw the line? Should the state fund everyone to have body modifications if they have self-esteem issues that they've pinned to a particular aspect of their appearance? Again, it's this idea that the state is obliged to intervene to resolve all personal problems. That is not, in my view, what the state or the NHS should be about.


    It really does depend on the circumstances. Also, I think a lot of my opinion is based on the lack of necessity to torture someone for years if they could be remedied in the short term. In a lot of cases counselling and/or further psychological treatments most probably will work, with varying degrees of success. How long those treatments will take is anyone's guess and the fact remains that they may never work.


    In Luke's case (no he doesn't have boobs ;) ) he was bullied severely for his ears throughout his childhood. He got into fights three or four times every week in attempt to defend himself from the onslaught of abuse. He was regularly suicidal. Now, I don't think having his ears pinned back was necessarily the correct solution, and if it were my children suffering the same abuse I would address it entirely differently. However, having the operation instantly improved his quality of life. That I can't argue with.


    If it makes their lives bearable, I just can't refuse that. Sometimes taking the easy way out is the better thing to do if it drastically improves quality of life. There may be lessons worth learning in addressing your demons but if that is at the cost of years spent suffering that could otherwise have been avoided then it seems somewhat counter-productive to me.

    That's an arse-over-tit argument though (s'cuse the pun ;)). "Give them what they want, because if we don't, it'll cost us more money"?!


    Mental and emotional issues should be dealt with on that level - not through surgery. The idea that it's the job of the state to rectify every problem in a person's life is frankly crazy. :shrug:


    You misunderstand me. Financial issues were raised earlier in the thread and so I simply provided a counter-argument ;)
    Something as invasive as breast implants should be determined by how beneficial it would be to the individual. For some people, counselling just doesn't work :shrug:


    Perhaps a waiting period would be valuable, during which they are under the care of a psychiatrist/psychologist, in order to determine whether or not surgery is the better option for them.

    *But* there is a difference between helping someone whose life is in danger and someone who wants cosmetic surgery because they are unhappy with their bodies. For a start, if it suddenly became 'free' on the NHS, a lot more people would be getting liposuction, hair transplants etc.etc. (and all of these things do come with risks.)


    It already is free if you are persistent enough (and effected on such a level that life is impossible, etc)


    How much counselling would you think someone would require to get over something like that? How long do you think they'd be in need of treatment? Let's take the very worst case as a starting point:


    She's so depressed that she won't leave the house. She needs counselling, medication and regular support from the various mental health services in her area. She can't work, and as such has to claim ESA and, most probably, DLA.


    By the time we've added those costs together we may as well have given her the boobs she wanted and made her happy. Even with very mild cases, the psychological treatment required to overcome those feelings doesn't come cheap.

    What if being poor is causing a great amount of distress and inhibiting your life? Should that be resolved at the expense of the state? It just seems odd to me that we look to the state to resolve all causes of unhappiness. I struggle to see why the state should fund breast enlargements. :shrug:


    So, what if, for example, a person had smoked and subsequently developed breast cancer, leading to the removal of her breasts? In that instance, I don't know many people that would disagree with her having the surgery to give her new breasts, yet it could be argued that she at least contributed to her own suffering.
    (EDIT: I actually know nothing about whether or not smoking contributes to breast cancer, I was merely making an analogy)


    How do we separate who should receive help from the state and who shouldn't? I think if a person's physical appearance is inhibiting their life to the extent that I have seen in the past (not leaving the house, for example) then we should accept that it's gone beyond the point of shallow vanity.


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    The person paying for it ;)


    :rofl: Give over, I pay for nowt, remember? ;)


    Ooh it's a while since we've locked horns. I likes it :reddevil:

    I think if someone would benefit greatly from having the surgery then good for them. Yes, counselling would be a good idea initially, but it doesn't work for everyone. I think if it's causing a great amount of distress and inhibiting their life as a result then it absolutely should be paid for by the NHS.
    It's easy to underestimate how badly someone can be affected psychologically by their physical appearance and if having the surgery enables them to live happily then who am I to judge? :shrug:


    Personally, I couldn't give a crap whether or not my boobs are big enough, round enough or in the right place. I think being confident in the way you look is far more attractive, at times, than how you actually look.

    I very much like to look after people... I was a stand-in mother to a lot of people before I had a child (including most of my boyfriends...) and I wouldn't want to change that, but I think it would be helpful if I could mother myself a little bit too. I'm OK at being kind to myself in some respects - I don't feel guilty for having treats to eat or sleeping late when I have the chance, etc... but because I have self-esteem problems I tend to feel I don't deserve good things, and when it comes to cooking myself a balanced meal, for example, I tend to think "what's the point?" if it's only for me to eat.


    I also find it very hard to ask for or accept help because I guess I assume people won't want to do it, or it will be a huge inconvenience to them, and that I'm not worth the bother.


    And another thing, I suppose, is that I give myself a tremendously hard time about things. If I'm saying "God I'm such a twat" and someone asks me "would you think that about *me* if I did the same?" then I realise the answer is no, of course I wouldn't.


    This.

    Nervous, blood test tomorrow, I really dislike having needls put in me, last time i went the phlebotomist screwed up and had to put the needle in again which made me even more fooking anxious. :S


    You gotta admit, though phlebotomy, p-h-lebotomy. It's an awesome word, isn't it? Just rooooollls off yer tongue :D

    Oh dont know why that posted again. They said he has been and i cant see any, but yet to have a check ! He does not act coltish around the filly


    Well that's something, he shouldn't be too much trouble to break (hate that term) but you know what I mean :)