I logged on after reading your first post as I wanted to give you a big hug. I can't offer any advice beyond that which has already been posted but reading your post made me feel so sad and angry on your behalf. A positive labour and birth experience can make so much difference to how you feel, even when the outcome isn't as hoped, and *all* mothers deserve that opportunity.
Follow the advice that's been posted here, look after Eli but don't forget to look after yourself too. Lots of love xxx