I feel like there is a beautiful bird of prey, at dawn taking flight from a high cliff inside my chest.
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Peppers stuffed with spicy quinoa, mushrooms and black beans..with new potatos and green beans
I made vegan burgers with onion, carrot, garlic, TVP, veg stock, tomato puree, soya sauce, smoked paprika, thyme, oregano, peanut butter, mustard and oat flour.
Served with roasted parsnips, new potatos and green beans straight out of my mama's garden. Nom nom
I've got a few reusable sanitary pads that I use in conjunction with my mooncup but they were no where near that expensive Ebay is definitely a better option.
Can't say I've found the reusable ones much different to the washable ones in terms of freshness, wetness etc however, the one thing I did find was that the crotch of some of my knickers is quite a bit narrower than the pad once it's poppered in place. Which means it's loose enough to move. The other week when I was in work I kept having to pop to the loo to readjust as the bloody thing (no pun intended :p) kept swivelling around so it was upside down!
hehe thanks Noctula!
I think I will buy a couple from ebay to try out and then buy more if they suit.
Ah thanks Will have a look x x
Cool thanks x Just had a look. Looks like they are all being sold from america though, I want to try and buy from the UK if I can.
I'm thinking about buying some wemoon pads. Does anyone have any experience of these? My mum seems to think that they wont be as absorbent as disposable ones and will leave you feeling wet and uncomfortable. Is this true? I currently use disposable sanitary pads in conjunction with a mooncup and spend approximately £2 on sanitary pads per month. It would cost me about £60 to buy 6 wemoon pads. Meaning it will take about 2 and a half years for them to pay for themselves. And I guess theres no guarantee that the wemoon pads will last that long. I'd rather not continue using disposable sanitary products but it does seem like the cheaper option. Does anyone know if I can buy cheaper re-usable sanitary towel from anywhere?
I have either seen or hallucinated fairies a few times. They were very quick and scooted around my room very fast knocking things over and laughing about it.
I'm kinda thinking "why me?","why here?"and "what does it want?"
Just some ideas (assuming it is a ghost)...
It may not even be aware that you exist.
Or it may have realised that you have some awareness of it and is quite enjoying the attention.
Or it may be you thats causing the experinces.
Or it may be a person you have known thats passed away gently making contact?
Or it may be another live person in your block travelling on the astral and causing things to happen.
Whatever it is, it may not want anything at all. And if it does want something then maybe you have to decide whether you feel like you want to try and be open to finding that out. I have asked out loud before now "what do you want? Can I help?" and then have recieved a message in a dream, that was then clarified by another living person. I dont think its your obligation to do anything. But it sounds like you are open and interested to finding out more. So you could try asking and see what happens? Though in the past I've scared myself silly through asking and thinking I was open to a response and then finding it too much to take when I actually got one. Be gentle with yourself. If you dont feel like you could cope with a response then dont ask for one.Quote
. I'm not particularly sure if I want it to stop, but I'd definitely like to not be scared by whatever it is and maybe have some sort of understanding.
I have overcome these kind of fears to an extent through reassuring myself continually over a number of years that it is unlikely that anything would want to hurt me and that even if something did I am perfectly capable of putting up a fight. I learnt this through having a few scary experiences and learning my strength. Dont underestimate the strength of your mind.
I think its a very natural instinct to be afraid of something unusual and uninvited in your space. I have found that lots of concious reassurance of myself really helps.
If you do decide you need it to go though, I know of a couple of things that have worked for me that I could help with.
I dont know what ghosts are. Dont know if they are dead people or live people, real people or imaginary people or something else entirely. But I've had some experiences with them.
In some cases I have attempted to communicate. But then couldn't cope when I was communicated back with. Got scared, blocked them out, and then created what felt like an angry ghost.
In other cases I have decided to protect myself against them. Done visualisations to keep the experiences away or done things in the physical relam to keep the experiences away.
At times I have embraced the experiences despite fear, worked through the fear, learnt a lot and felt a sense of relief.
At othertimes I have felt very comfortable with the experiences, communicated with the ghost or attempted to and then felt a sense of relief and the experinces stopped.
I think what you should do depends entirely on what feels right to you. Even if you do something and it feels afterwards as though you shouldn't have done that, you will still learn something to help you the next time you experience something similar.
Good luck x
My lovely housemates practising on my unicycle, and the lovely children in my class, and the lovely lady I'm going out for dinner with tonight.
*melts in a puddle of happy goo*
Rasberries and blueberries with creme frais for breakfast!!! heeeeeeeee
I'm having dahl, rice and broccoli.
Followed by strawberries
Having a naked swim in the sea
*Big love to you* I dont have any wise words but I am thinking of you often, be gentle with yourself, allow yourself plenty of time for healing :heart:
x x x x x x
Roasted carrot, parsnip, pepper, onion and garlic seasoned with olive oil and mixed herbs, veggy sausages, boiled potato, steamed broccoli with onion and mushroom gravy.
A couple of glasses of bubbly pink wine.
And soon to follow...chocolate sponge pudding.
mmmmmmmmm, I love Sundays
Yesterday made me smile lots.
Red wine, delicious french cheese, hours of girly sex chat, fireworks and then attending an outdoor rock concert in my pyjamas.
I dyed sand various colours and layered it in jars with the children to make lovely patterns.
I also painted fish with them and started to teach them knitting
Might try and get some pictures tomorrow.
Luckily the kids completely wore me out today and I am dying of tired...which is an excellent distraction. Phew!
I'm really really struggling with the urges this week. I go to bed with them, I wake up with them. I think about self harm all the time, even in school around the kids, I think about taking a pair of scissors to the bathroom. I want the clean straight line, the wonderful deep sting and the beautiful red *sigh* I'm holding on as much as I possibly can, I thought yoga today might help, but it hasn't at all. Maybe if I can hold on for one more day until after the full moon that'll help? ahhhh, I hope so.
Simple veg stir fry..carrot, broccoli, red onion, mushroom, red pepper, smoked tofu, big garlic chunks, chinese five spice, dark soya sauce and tobasco sauce....served with quinoa. Nom!
Love and best wishes DJ :hug:
Today I danced so wildly that I thought IO was going to have a heart attack, like every cell in my body was moving in a different direction so simultaneously fast that I was sure my heart was going to rip and my insides couldn't possibly stay inside, My bones were going to snap,. it hurt so much buit I couldn't stop it felt amazing too. raaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr And everything is still so fast fast fast fast... fatser faster faster. BUT I LOVE IT.
I was going to hold on
why couldfn't I even stick to that plan. hold on hold on hold on... only till tomorrow... cos if I could make it through until tomorrow then I'd be seeing a man .,.. an man who was going to help me. and now I exploded just before the crutical moment and I ah great bucklets of hellraising chocolate trainers
I thought it wasn't going to happena nd now I can feel my blood ripple with exstacy stuggling to contain a star exploding in each pore. woooooosh. I guess theres only so long you can contain it
its funny how it worked
fucnctioning well functioning welll functioning welll. I was even functioning well an hour ago communicted sensibly going to be okay. Gotta hide in here now though, because my hosuemates...they sont know I cant be kicked out again in hiding in my bedroom., its a small space for an exploding star.
Small girl, aged 5 "If you fall in love with someone, does a baby start to grow in your tummy?"
Me, "ummmm, welll, sometimes if two people are in love with each other they choose to have a baby."
Small girl, holding her t-shirt up and looking at her tummy with a worried face, "uh oh"
:hug: Thanks everyone :hug:
The water cycle lesson went awesome, kids happy, my boss happy, nice bright display up on the wall. Tomorrow I'm making mini water cycles in jars using soil, weeds, water and clingfilm. Quite excited about it. I think myu creative fear is reduced quite a lot when I'm away from my family in wales, even though I know they are well meaning.
I watched "The Fountain" last night. I liked it...But seriously, what the fuck? I had no idea what was going on through the marjority of it, and it left me seriously confused and frustrated.
Just thought I'd post an update.
I've been taking the beta blockers for a week now. Very strange at first but I'm getting used to it (I used to be able to feel my heart pounding all the time, now my chest feels empty ).
Good news - very little panic. A couple of times this week I've felt like it's starting but then I just feel really sleepy!.
5 more weeks of tablets to go and then we'll see if it comes back.
Best of luck x x x
Let us know how it goes.
Being sent this poem as an aid for teaching my kids the water cycle tomorrow
Little Johnny Raindrop
Falls down from the sky.
Mother Earth is happy.
Now her plants won't die.
Little Johnny Raindrop
Feeds the plants and then
Down he goes into the earth
But he'll be back again.
Once he's far beneath the ground
He seeps out to the sea.
The sun shines down and warms him.
The ocean sets him free.
Invisible he rises
And with others forms a cloud.
Johnny tells the other drops
Cheerfully out loud,
"Were vapor now but when we're cold
We'll turn again to rain."
"And water all the plants below
So they will not complain."