Recently got an email from b3ta.com which brought back happy memories of their question of the week, to which i have contributed several stories over the years. That and a post in another thread got me thinking about stuff you'd maybe like to confess to.
So, anyone have any amusing confessions that they would like to unburden themselves from for the amusement of others?
I'll start. Years ago we used to have a manager. Lets call him Steve, and he was a first class twat, who was production based but somehow managed to find himself in charge of the engineers. I dont know whether its common knowledge, but there is always a rift between the two departments, mainly because of the amount that we get paid and the fact that if everything is running then we are sat around with nothing to do.
So, when he got this position he tried cracking down on the department in various ways, one of which was the proposal to make a third of us redundant as we were obviously overmanned. A couple of us had decided that revenge of some sort was in order, even though it wasnt us that were for the chop. His office was a glass walled affair inside the main office of the factory, a busy ready meal production facility. This office for obvious reasons was known as the goldfish bowl and was never locked.
One nightshift, one of the guys on shift took the night manager to show him a problem with some caustic pipework in the roof which we'd known about for a few days but were saving until we were ready. Office clear we moved in - back in the earlyish days of computing we had Compaq Digital PC5100 pc's which sported the latest Pentium one 200mhz processor. Crucially these were passively cooled, ie they had no fan just a big heatsink on top of the processor. The lid was also easily removeable, wasnt locked and was before the days of chassis intrusion detection in the BIOS.
Thusly on top of the heatsink was obviously just the place to hide a plastic tray full of prawns from the boil in the bag prawn curry line, so the case was opened and the trap set. We thought ahead and also placed half a dozen decoy prawns in the plastic trim of his office chair.
It was a few days before the smell really started, putting our shift all in the clear as we were on rest days. When we returned to work the smell in the main office was overpowering, Steve was forced to work on in his office with the door open and a fan blowing out the door. They had been through the office and found the decoy prawns, replaced the chair and assumed, as we had hoped that our plan had been foiled, and that the smell would disappear in a day or two.
A few days later the office was ripped apart, even the trunking work for the sockets and ethernet was opened and checked. The smell now was so bad that everywhere Steve went he smelled of rotten prawns! Nothing was found so they got professional cleaners in over a weekend. Monday morning it smelt reasonable, everyone breathed a sigh of relief (and clean air), Steve came in at 8am with a smile (ish) on his face - all was well. Then he went into the office and turned his pc on to start work. A few minutes later the smell was back, no-one made the connection and a few people in the office were commenting that it was alright until Steve arrived, a double bonus!
Sadly over the next few days the smell died away, the office was now locked at night so no further opportuninty, but Steve - you deserved it. You were, and probably still are, a c#nt of the first order.