Love spoils sex?

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  • I used to have a pretty open attitude to sex but when I found myself in a relationship things became different. It felt like everything had to have some hidden meaning. I've always hated the term 'making love' its so disney but it seems whether you like it or not this weirdness creeps in and its suffocating. anyone else experienced this or am i just a bit f**ked up ;)

  • Hi ya Gang,
    For me, I'm a Strong believer in 'Flirting', 'Having a Quickie', 'Having Sex', 'Role Playing' & 'Making Love' But MUCH prefer to do it ALL With the SAME Partner !.
    But then I'm single, so arnt really qualified to say what works lol lol.

  • Love cant spoil sex because they are two very different things...
    Sex:
    (Oxford dictionary) - physical activity between two people in which they touch each other’s sexual organs, and which may include sexual intercourse


    Love is more emotional attachment than Physical although may include both. Its also about respect, trust yadda yadda yadda!


    But yeah... if your looking for some good old "get on down and get dirty" or even just "red hot passionate sex"...
    You will find that in a lustful relationship with someone new or unatainable.
    Long term relationships seldom harbour both love and honey moon period sex for any great length of time.

  • How long have you been in the relationship?


    I think there are various stages. Pre-relationship, you don't really care too much what the other thinks and tend to let yourself go. In the beginning of a relationship you feel more nervous and don't want to scare your partner off. Later, if things are going well and feelings have developed, you get more comfortable and revert back to letting yourself go, with the bonus of now knowing what the other likes! That's my experience of it anyway.


    I think I know what you're getting at, however - treating your partner like a piece of meat? Which can be more difficult if you're in a loving relationship. It depends who you're with I suppose.

  • LOVE makes for great, secure, loving, meaningful sex


    LUST makes for great, awesome, short lived but in the end meaningless sex.......


    Yup Two sentences and youve said what i was trying to say
    Waffle waffle waffle


    KISS
    Keep It Simple Silly!

  • Long term relationships seldom harbour both love and honey moon period sex for any great length of time.[/QUOTE]


    Depends on how long you re talking here?!:angel: Im lucky enough,at last to have found both..As for love spoiling it...i know im loved,and for me has made it even better.Iv never quite understood the deeper meaning of the actual phrase "making love"you make a cake,make a meal..loves not made,it developes,evolves,deepens with understanding of each other..i cant see how that can spoil sex,if you really deeply know and love someone,have a real deep connection to me that can only make a clear way to totally indulge and loose yourself in each other.And that cant be a bad thing:DXx

  • I don't think so - but every relationship is different depending on how you (both) relate. If it's right, then the whole thing is great. If there are problems then it doesn't feel so good. That's not saying that any relationship will ever be perfect, but I think you (I) know when it's right, or if in fact it's not :o

    ' When you feel like giving up, remember why you held on for so long in the first place '

  • There's more than two ways I can look at this. The OP is right in that, I love my grandma but that wouldn't make the sex any better, no matter how hard she tried.
    On the other hand, I have mind blowing sex with my younger partner, who I love in a very different way to my grandma.
    If your lucky enough to love the one your fucking, you would not be complaining I guess. Maybe you love the convenience of making love to your partner, but don't love her as much as you want to f**ck another. It's quite common for the grass to be always greener.
    If you've ever had or ever get the chance to be in love with the same person your shagging, for more than the 7 year itch. Then you will probably realise, the potential depth of the love you can crave and all the trust and freedom that goes with it.
    Not everyone can orchestrate shagging, f**cking, love making the way we or our partner prefers. Tho we may all try. It's a personal thing and without good communication, we second guess or fall back into our own trusted methods.


    Superted do you enjoy sex more with your partner, when you are drunk or out your head on some suitable drug?

  • There's more than two ways I can look at this. The OP is right in that, I love my grandma but that wouldn't make the sex any better, no matter how hard she tried.
    On the other hand, I have mind blowing sex with my younger partner, who I love in a very different way to my grandma.
    If your lucky enough to love the one your fucking, you would not be complaining I guess. Maybe you love the convenience of making love to your partner, but don't love her as much as you want to f**ck another. It's quite common for the grass to be always greener.
    If you've ever had or ever get the chance to be in love with the same person your shagging, for more than the 7 year itch. Then you will probably realise, the potential depth of the love you can crave and all the trust and freedom that goes with it.
    Not everyone can orchestrate shagging, f**cking, love making the way we or our partner prefers. Tho we may all try. It's a personal thing and without good communication, we second guess or fall back into our own trusted methods.


    Superted do you enjoy sex more with your partner, when you are drunk or out your head on some suitable drug?


    I don't think sex with Grandma is a good idea :whistle::eek:

  • pyke 13


    i'm 6ft 5 so i know your pain. legs everywhere accompanied by fear of falling into the fire. its not really lighting up your sex life. more like setting fire to your head

  • You know what? I feel I am going to get slaughtered for saying this but at my age (60) its the women who want the casual hits and are not looking for a long term thing.


    tin hat on, fire away


    Haha! Its all the divorcees who have been dumped for a younger model I expect :D


    They grow bitter :insane:

  • You know what? I feel I am going to get slaughtered for saying this but at my age (60) its the women who want the casual hits and are not looking for a long term thing.


    tin hat on, fire away



    That's interesting, Bernie, I wonder if perhaps they've been in very long relationships and just want to enjoy themselves without getting too involved? I know a friend of mine said the same thing when he tried internet dating; he wanted to meet someone but ladies that approached him didn't want to get serious they just wanted a short term thing. Maybe it just involves less energy, lol?

  • Yep I'm guilty of that. Just come out of a(nother) long term relationship and I really can't be bothered any more. A fuckbuddy would be good, but there's no way i wanna be someone's 'girlfriend'.

  • Yep I'm guilty of that. Just come out of a(nother) long term relationship and I really can't be bothered any more. A fuckbuddy would be good, but there's no way i wanna be someone's 'girlfriend'.


    And why not, I think it can get to the stage where it does just feel like too much work so if you can find someone that is equally happy with a less serious arrangement then I think that can be really good for both parties. I don't generally feel like I have the time for a relationship most of the time, I do think I'd be better suited to someone who does have quite a busy life themself (or at least is happy doing their own thing a lot of the time) but then I don't know if that's just because I've been on my own for a long time so of course you get used to keeping yourself busy?

  • Hmm I expect the women are growing more wiser not bitter!lol I can see their point actually.Most older women have spent their lives looking after their men,cooking,cleaning up after them,washing their clothes etc.Why not have a few benefits without the extra work involved! ;) I think if anything happened to my husband and I found myself single,I would like to remain single.

  • For me, I enjoy the moments after sex; you know where you are all snuggled up with the guy, kissing him and sleeping beside him...but maybe that's because I've never been sexually satisfied!