I am starting to feel very frustrated with maternity care in my area and with my midwifes and GP.
To explain from the beginning at about 5 weeks I had severe pain my side so I needed to have a scan to make sure the baby was not ectopic. Everything was fine. 2 weeks later I had to go back to the doctors with bleeding...another scan everything was fine. I then started getting stabbing pains in my cervix accompanied by really thick white/yellow discharge and serious burning in my vagina...I mean you can see it i am lobster red.
Obviously went back to the doctors...she said Thrush... had to courses of treatment which did not help at all nor did any natural remedy. Went back to the doctors they took swabs. I the mean time it got so when i was peeing the second the pee hit the sore area it was horribly sore. I told the doctor this...several tests...all tests and swabs came back negative. Doctor was meant to phone me with these results but never bothered. About 4 appointments later and after trying several doctors I was told that all the doctors would have a chat about my symptoms to see what they could do at their next meeting.
I made another appointment and I was told that due to me BPD and previous mental health that there were two options. The doctor thinks it is "all in my head" and suggested I kept coming to the doctors for reassurance about my pregnany... another doctor thought it was a symptom of my Intersitual Cystitis and to talk to my urologist in Febuary. Now bareing in my mind I know it has nothing to do with this as I have IC for 2 years now and I have never had swollen bright red burning vagina as a symptom. My IC is a problem with my bladder. I feel I have been completely dismissed.
Anyway the doctor rang me and said she had decided to write a letter to my midwife amanda to say that she thinks I need extra appointments. She wrote a long letter explaining my intire history from BPD to PTSD to the rapes and the abortion and DV and everything. She also asked of the midwife could refer me to a specialist to have second opinion on my burning.
My midwife rang me and made me a non-routine appointment with herself. I thought things were finally going to get fixed only to turn up to meet a different midwife who was rude and abrupt. She asked me why i was there and I explained that I was meant to be seeing amanda about the letter from the doctor. She said I would probably never get to meet amanda and it is unlikely i will get to see the same midwife twice through out my intire pregnancy or birth. Amanda has swapped shifts. She knew nothing of my doctors letter so I once again had to explain to the 3rd midwife now my history. I said that i was told i would get to see a mental health midwife but she told me that i had been assessed for that and the mental health midwife only sees people with "severe" issues. She said because I have never had an inpatient stay i do not qualify to see the Mental health midwife. In response to my anxiety and when i told her about my trauma she just said "oh poor you" and said that there is nothing they can help me with, I just need to get on with it unless my pregnancy becomes high risk. She advised I go back to my GP for a referrell for counselling (even though i said that was pointless as 1. I have had years of counselling and it has never really helped and 2. the waiting list is 6 months by which time i will be ready to give birth)...she just said oh... well there is nothing we can help you with and has refused to let me have any more non routine midwife appointments for security, I told her that it states in my letter that the GP whishes me to have more regular appointments...but she refused to acknowlege a letter even exists. She also wouldnt write anything i just told her on my file so I didnt have to repeat myself to ever single midwife I get to meet...
I also told her about this burning and pain and she just said that there is nothing they can do and I have to get my GP to do something about it. So I am going round in circles and i have had this severe burning for 2 months now!
And to top it off I have had to have my booking appointment blood tests done 4 times now!!! due to errors on their behalf includeing sending my blood to the wrong place and loosing my form.
I am starting to feel like I have no trust in them which is upsetting me. If I can't trust my normal midwifes to listen to me and take what i have to say into account instead of dismissing me I really cant see how i can trust midwifes in the hospital to do this so its making me even more set on a homebirth which is something chilly does not want me to have but has agreed to let me do so and obviously as much as i insist there may be a need to go to hospital even with a home birth. if I am honest I am starting to feel that upset and dismissed that I dont even want any of them to turn up and deliver my baby even at a home birth... they are all so hurtful and dismissive.
I came home and cryed for hours yesterday... not sure what I can do about any of this...