co-sleeping help

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  • Try the Green Parent website. I don't go on there much anymore, but I found it really nice when Izzy was a baby, just to be conversing with other people on the same parenting page as me (This place was NOT all that friendly towards attachment parenting back then ;)).

  • thanks medusa that group looks good i hadn't actually thought about looking for fb groups!! green parent looks good too. i'll check out those authors too, thank you!
    i assumed it must be that we want children in their own rooms so we can have sex without feeling awkward. couldn't see any other reason.
    my mum gave me a really interesting book on what the 'experts' have advised about upbringing and where baby should sleep, when and how to feed and so on, from over the last few hundred years. was very interesting... and mostly i learnt that it's amazing how we have survived at all (one expert advised not feed to baby until the milk came in as the colostrum was bad O.o)

    we reenact Noah's ancient drama, but in reverse, like a film running backwards, the animals exiting

  • Mozart was brought up on sugar-water instead of breastmilk and did the same with his six children, believing it to be superior... four of them died in infancy, unsurprisingly.


    And when formula was first introduced, it was promoted as being nutritionally *superior* to breastmilk, doctor-approved. So mothers chose not to breastfeed and instead to give their babies shop-bought formula if they could afford it, because they believed it was best for them.

  • one health visitor i spoke to said that 'follow on' formula was invented just so they could advertise formula on tv, as they're not allowed to advertise the first milk stuff any more... though i don't think she had any evidence for this, but i can believe it!

    we reenact Noah's ancient drama, but in reverse, like a film running backwards, the animals exiting

  • one health visitor i spoke to said that 'follow on' formula was invented just so they could advertise formula on tv, as they're not allowed to advertise the first milk stuff any more... though i don't think she had any evidence for this, but i can believe it!


    Yeah I've heard that, looking at the history of formula is quite an eye opening area, lets just say that not all genius ideas are good some could be called pure evil.

  • I started off with my now-nearly-6-month-old in a moses basket right up nest to my mattress, but as time's gone on, and he's got bigger and I'm less alarmed about squashing him, he's hopped in with me more and more. He wakes up with a big smile on his beautiful face and so do I! It feels so natural, I think you've got to go with what feels right for you. I'm living in a truck and on the move, a ot of my friends don't have babies and aren't interested, and we're far from family... I can sympathise with you on that one. I don't get on a computer very often but happy to chat if I can. Take it easy! x

  • one health visitor i spoke to said that 'follow on' formula was invented just so they could advertise formula on tv, as they're not allowed to advertise the first milk stuff any more... though i don't think she had any evidence for this, but i can believe it!


    It is most definitely true
    There never used to be such a thing 'follow on' milk until there was a ban on advertising formula milk for the under 6month olds

  • i've been told that when baby gets teeth, stop feeding it breastmilk. makes me wonder what happens to poor babies born with teeth!!
    but i live in quite a poor area, and apparently poorer areas have lower breastfeeding stats. which is illogical to me because if you have less money, why would you opt for buying formula (when you have the choice) o.o
    Tho there was a programme on last week about breastfeeding and it suggested that teenagers don't breastfeed because their boobs are for/about sex :/


    I read about a study in a book on child development.. Japanese and American (USA) babies were shown to respond the same to object. But the mothers responded differently... American mothers responded more positively when the babies played with the objects than them, whereas Japanese mothers responded more positively when their babies interacted with them. the suggestion was that independence is more highly valued than dependence very early on in America. (and I guess we have the same kind of attitude now - perhaps because breastfeeding, co-sleeping etc all limit the mothers personal freedom.)

    we reenact Noah's ancient drama, but in reverse, like a film running backwards, the animals exiting


  • and apparently poorer areas have lower breastfeeding stats. which is illogical to me because if you have less money, why would you opt for buying formula (when you have the choice)


    Because they get free formula. I just found breast feeding so much easier, no need to faff around with bottles, sterilisers, right temps etc and lovely cuddles at the same time....although I did stop shortly after teeth came through, not because of teeth but was right time for me.

  • I randomly came across this online mag the other day and thought it might be of interest here. Its got some pro breastfeeding/co-sleeping etc articles but also a whole bunch of other interesting stuff about different cultural ideas on parenting and different families lives,thoughts and conscious choices with their kids. Tis worth a look..


    http://www.incultureparent.com/about/


    http://www.incultureparent.com…feeding-around-the-world/



    (second linky is to pics and info about breastfeeding around the world)

  • It's maybe a bit late for me to come in on this conversation but I'm going to anyway because I so wish such a forum was available when my daughter was born (14 years ago!). I couldn't agree more with all the people who advocate doing what feels natural to you. My daughter and I slept together as soon as we got home and every place we lived (many) until she was about 2 and I breast fed until she was 2 and half and it felt the right time for us both to stop. I read all the 'expert advice' and was given a load of grief from all sorts of people about the way i was raising her. Have confidence in yourself, if you're happy and your baby's happy where's the problem? You are the expert on your child from day 1 - nobody else knows him or her better than you. My daughter has adjusted without any problems to a whole load of different environments and experiences - she had no problem sleeping on people's sofas, in noise, in quiet, anywhere. I found being a (pretty much single) parent a horrendously isolating experience to begin with - went to a local (free) baby massage class, purely to meet other human beings and that was enough for me. Sounds like you're sorted now anyway. :clap: Enjoy!

  • just wanted to say that since i moved house a month ago, i've found a breastfeeding group and the health visitors there are pro co-sleeping and i've met other mummys who do the same (some with baby just in bed between mum and dad) so i've been feeling a lot more confident about it. it helps so much having other people to talk to in person. as great as having the forum is it's not quite the same as chatting to people face to face! i did get made t feel crappy for breastfeeding at another group tho, all the other mums were bottle feedng and chatting about teats and thngs and so i couldn't join in, and then wen i started feeding her i got several dirty looks :( it's funny, never had any dirty looks or comments from ppl apart from at a mother/baby group! strange world.

    we reenact Noah's ancient drama, but in reverse, like a film running backwards, the animals exiting

  • Another late poster on the thread! ;)


    If you haven't found it already then have a look on the natural mamas forum... Its a wonderful, wonderful uk forum which is full of wisdom & support about all aspects of natural parenting (it has a special emphasis on babywearing... Mmmmm...woven wraps.... Mmmmmm ;) ) but stacks of info on co-sleeping, extended breast feeding, attachment parenting, cloth nappies,, home schooling, oh, everything. It also has local networks within. :D Have a look- its well worth it!


    A great author on co-sleeping & natural parenting is Deborah Jackson- she wrote '3 in a bed' which happily I read before giving birth so I never had any qualms about having our son in bed with us. She's very straightforward. :)


    It's funny how you come across ideas for parenting that really click in the most unlikely places... I was 8 weeks' pregnant & had No Idea that you didn't have to have pram/cot/steriliser, all that expensive kit... But we were chatting to a random bloke at sunrise festival & he started reminiscing about his days of co-sleeping with his little ones & it just sounded gorgeous. Scales fell from my eyes.
    We've co-slept since day one & I still brestfeed him at nearly 2.


    Good luck!

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  • thx :) finally got internet again so gna treat myself to some books! we recently got a co-sleeping cot that fits perfectly next to the bed too, so it's just like a bed extension!! apparently u can't use it after the baby can sit up on her own which is a bit annoying (i didn't realise this until after we bought it and set it up!) but it'll be grand in the mean time

    we reenact Noah's ancient drama, but in reverse, like a film running backwards, the animals exiting

  • right.. next stage! what happens when baby starts moving about on her own? cos if i put her to bed, she could then crawl across it, and go splat on the floor. :S what do you do?? i tried putting her to sleep in her cot last night in preperation of this (she's in bed next to me still, with co sleeper cot on her other side) but she got VERY cross and screamed until i put her back in the bed :/ But eveni f she was in the cot, she cud still crawl out and fall onto the floor. :/

    we reenact Noah's ancient drama, but in reverse, like a film running backwards, the animals exiting

  • You can get flexible mesh sides that fit under the mattress to stop them falling out but tbh I just put Finn to bed in the middle and he didn't wriggle too much. I have a very low bed King sized bed though so wasn't too concerned. When I went up to bed he hadn't really moved that much.

  • thx :) finally got internet again so gna treat myself to some books! we recently got a co-sleeping cot that fits perfectly next to the bed too, so it's just like a bed extension!! apparently u can't use it after the baby can sit up on her own which is a bit annoying (i didn't realise this until after we bought it and set it up!) but it'll be grand in the mean time

    I kept our co-sleeper cot up until he grew out of it lengthwise. It's another barrier to stop them falling out and it gave me a bit more room to spread out when I was getting forced to the edge of the bed. I've woken up many a night with either my head or my bum inside the cot!

  • I just have a normal mesh side up for Gwen on my bed. She has never fallen out . They do soon learn to wander to the other end and get of the bed. I have a baby gate up so she can't leave the room

  • I kept our co-sleeper cot up until he grew out of it lengthwise. It's another barrier to stop them falling out and it gave me a bit more room to spread out when I was getting forced to the edge of the bed. I've woken up many a night with either my head or my bum inside the cot!


    I had the co-sleeper cot up until Izzy was three. I had one of the mesh bed rail things next to it, so the whole length of the bed was secure, until she was 2.

  • I have had both my kids in with me I slept with them laying on my arm snuggled into my chest so they could not move and could get boob as they choice through the night I think co sleeping makes a deep bond. I am pregnant now and will do the same with this baby. I have my daughter laid next to me asleep at the moment. Might not be any room for hubby in bed much longer lol.