Sex during pregnancy?

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  • Ok, so I am currently nearing the end of my first trimester. This is my second pregnancy, my first ended with what is medically called a "missed miscarriage". Our baby died spontaneously, as far as anyone knows there was nothing wrong as such, it just happens sometimes.

    I haven't felt even remotely like having sex so far during my pregnancy, but as all the nausea and stuff is subsiding I am starting to feel a little sexier...

    So for all the mums out there - what were your experiences with sex in pregnancy? Do you think it's safe throughout your pregnancy or are there times when you wouldn't?

    How about toys? I just used a vibrator for the first time and... wow. I still feel like jelly even now. I read up online first to check it was safe (I admit to being very very cautious about this baby) and Mmm! Yum.


  • Hey, if you're up for a vibrator then sex won't be a problem. There's no reason to refrain, just gets difficult to manouvre in the last weeks!

  • The weird thing is I feel really odd about anything going inside me - touching and play (like the vibrator) is lovely, but I seem to have a mental block about my husband entering me. It's not that I think it will hurt the baby because it obviously won't, it's more... I feel like I need to be gentle with my body, you know?

    Maybe I'm a bit mad :pp

  • I can totally understand your need to feel that you are being as gentle as possible with your body - but don't forget pregnancy and giving birth is what you are designed for.

    On a purely pragmatic note, the next 6months will be the last time for years, that you and your husband will be able to enjoy yourselves without fear of waking the baby or being discovered by small children!

  • 21 weeks pregnant and im soooo horny all the time!!!
    i sometimes feel like...'he wont find me attractive cos im huge' but he loves it...
    i was really worried about having sex to start with and i wouldnt let him touch me...especially when you're feeling all sicky it can be horrible....and i had really bad migranes too...

    huggles x.x.x

  • Sex is fine during pregnancy as long as your comfy laney got it right with woof woof but wonce you get a substaintial bump it can be a strain on your back so try spooning (I don't mean playing the spoons). If you need gentle then let your hubby know talk to him about it I'm sure he'll be totally cool with it mine was and we've got three now.

    To Kaz don't worry about him not liking you cos your getting big with bubba cos a vast majority of men really get turned on by it cos it's the most womanly you can be when your heavy with child!!

    Huggles to all the preggers ladies
    Take care rest lots and plenty of guiness!

  • never had a prob with it through out all my pregnancies

    but its down to the individual and how you feel

    talk to your hubby hun tell how you feel and you want to take it slow or gentle
    i found spooning to be great

  • I am at week 38 of my pregnancy and only now do I feel like having sex!! I had hyperemesis gravidarum for the first trimester and half of the second, so felt too ill to be sexy. I also developed a severe dislike of being touched or kissed at all, which was very weird, has anyone else heard of this? Maybe this was a particular mind mess all of my own. I still felt love and attraction for him and I still felt fairly attractive myself, so I was very confused by it. Any way, I couldn't bear husband touching me at all until gradually, over the last couple of months, we are back to being able to kiss and caress. And finally, I feel like doing it again!! Husband is very pleased and relieved (literally!) It is awkward as I have synthesis pubis dysfunction (yummy) which means my pelvic ligaments have become something like chewing gum, so I hurt loads afterwards, but it is still worth it. Hopefully it will bring on the labour too!

    I guess what I am saying is anything is normal (I have to think this to stay sane about the weirdness) so as long as you feel happy, it is the right thing to do.

  • Quote from Gillyflower

    I also developed a severe dislike of being touched or kissed at all, which was very weird, has anyone else heard of this?

    You're not alone, it's actually really common, just one of those things. Some women can go off it for years, poor blokes eh lol.

    Quote from Gillyflower

    It is awkward as I have synthesis pubis dysfunction

    I had this! It's evil! Thankfully it wasn't all that bad compared to some, i've heard some women end up on crutches and even in wheelchairs. Eeep!

  • Yeah, I feel a little bit like that... I don't mind pecks on the cheeks or lips but full-on kissing just feels wrong for some reason, and I don't like to sleep all cuddled up any more... mostly because it's bloody uncomfortable! I'm glad this isn't a case of me being "neurotic"!

  • Quote from epona_greenleaf

    Would not let hubby touch me first time I was pregnant, the next time we got close I got pregnant for the second time and touching was still then a no no! :(

    Poor you!! And husband!

    This is so cool though, I have felt like a cruel and unusual freak for this and now everyone else is as well!! Hooray! I have no problems being freakish, as long as I am in good company.

  • You've reminded me how I couldn't bear the smell of my partner for the first few months of pregnancy

  • Quote from colours of thewind

    You've reminded me how I couldn't bear the smell of my partner for the first few months of pregnancy

    Tell me about it - Poor husband ate one lowly ginger biscuit one day and I could smell it for hours and complained bitterly that he "reeked" of ginger and that he was "oozing it from his pores"! I wasn't that nice to him in the early stages, but luckily he was patient.

  • i want to add to the sexual weirdness during pregnancy thing!! it was like riding a rollercoaster week to week, sometimes i hated the mere thought, other times i wanted him so bad i jumped on him the second he got home from work...thankfully our main problem was i wanted it like mad but also had SPD which made it a nightmare!!

    in my first (which only got to 14 weeks sadly) and second pregnancies just the seam of my jeans pressing against my clit in the car used to get me nearly to the point of orgasm - everything was so sensitive - when we try again i'll be looking for that sensation as a sign of being preggers as i had that before i missed my period!!

    tigermouse, go with how you feel on the day and try not to worry, i know what a sweetie mr tigermouse is so let him know whats ok that day then go for it!!

    *wants to be preggers too*

  • Quote from JPumpkin

    just the seam of my jeans pressing against my clit in the car used to get me nearly to the point of orgasm

    When we went to Bournemouth on Saturday I was constantly aroused... it was such a strange experience - I didn't actually want to have sex, or even to masturbate, I just felt tingly and wet all day. Was lurvely ;)

  • Okay so I had a missed miscarriage too... before my daughter was conceived. I was a bit worried about sex to begin with.. understandably..

    But like you I began to feel sexier.. getting boobs really And I had oodles of sex.. well until the father walked out... And my daughter is now nearly six!

    So go for it.... :D

  • I Tried to have sex with my fella during my last pregnancy ... in the beginning it was good... at the end of it if we did it woof woof stylee then my bump hit the deck and if i went on top my bump literally touched my fellas chin LOL... it was hysterical... we had to give up coz he just couldnt breathe... I was expecting Twins heeheeee.

    Sex in pregnancy can be very lubly tho...